


leaping through life in a thousand colors

by souchipi



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Fluff, Gen, my attempt at humor, non-au, soft roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:48:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26121439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/souchipi/pseuds/souchipi
Summary: Kyuhyun teaches Hyukjae that life is about learning and getting used to all the things we can't understand, without exactly saying so.
Relationships: Cho Kyuhyun/Lee Hyukjae | Eunhyuk
Comments: 4
Kudos: 33





	leaping through life in a thousand colors

Hyukjae thinks it’s disconcerting that no one ever talks about the ghosts in empty practice rooms.

He does remember, with the clarity of twenty years ago, the stories Jungsu used to tell them in a futile attempt to shy them away from staying up too late practicing (or maybe, Hyukjae realizes, he just liked to blabber on and about anything that’d give him some spotlight.)  
They were always about some black-haired lady with red eyes and green moles who’d roam around the hallways in search of her dead boyfriend who was so overworked he dropped dead in the middle of a dance routine. Hyukjae used to wonder whether there’s a pinch of satirical truth to that story.

Hyukjae doesn’t believe in ghosts. Ghosts always turn out to be fake after a while, just like any other abstract thing in the universe. But there’s something about the way Hyukjae feels the ghosts of their songs seep into his mind after every dance practice, about the way he swears he could hear the footsteps of twelve or ten or nine (frankly, he lost the count at this point) boys walking around the place, trying to follow the tune before it gets replaced by their managers’ voices.

The ghost of music always finds a way to stay even when Hyukjae is tucked into bed, the rain heavy and sound outside, the echo slowly dying down in the background.

“Yongsun-hyung said that he’ll come fetch us in fifteen minutes.” Kyuhyun slides down the wall and takes a seat next to Hyukjae on the floor. He grabs his phone and stares at the screen for what seemed like minutes. “I’m thinking of making ddukbokki tonight, what do you think?”

“You don’t really need my opinion because you’re going to make it anyway,”

“That’s right,” Kyuhyun says in a beat. “I just thought you’d want to feel included.”

“How kind of you,” Hyukjae sarcastically says. He stares at their reflection in the mirror and purses his lips. “We stink.”

Kyuhyun scowls. “Speak for yourself, I just washed up.”

“Liar, your hair is greasy.”

“It’s wet.”

“Then, how come you don’t look like you’ve just showered?”

“Because you stink so bad that you can only smell your own sweat.”

“What does that have to do with that?”

“Because your perception of reality was altered by your own smell,”

“Jerk face.”

“Sweat.”

Hyukjae smiles and playfully knocks their shoulders together. “You should stop watching those conspiracy theories on Youtube,”

“It’s better than sitting around doing nothing.” Kyuhyun keeps his eyes on his phone. “Hyung, I worry about you sometimes. Do you realize that you literally spend your whole day staring at the ceiling?”

Hyukjae laughs amid a sigh. “Everything has been so monotonous that I can’t enjoy anything anymore. I need new challenges in my life,”

“I’ll give you one. Start washing your dishes.”

Hyukjae tilts his head. “I was thinking about buying a small studio in Osaka where I’d teach youngsters how to dance.”

Kyuhyun’s eyebrows quirk. “I thought that was your retirement plan?”

Hyukjae lapses into silence, his lips are slowly falling into a straight line. “There’s something I want to tell you, but it’s going to make me sound like Teukie-hyung and it’s embarrassing.”

Kyuhyun stares at him; He lifts his hand and wipes the smudged eyeliner on the corner of Hyukjae’s right eye. “Try me, I can do embarrassing.”

Hyukjae leans into the touch. “You say that now, but I know you. You will bring this up on TV and embarrass me in front of the whole nation.”

Kyuhyun chuckles. “Don’t worry, we’re not popular enough to have the whole nation watch our shows.”

“Theoretically speaking.”

“Just tell me already.”

“Lately I’ve been having these weird flashbacks about… back when everything started, you know? And I don’t mean when we debuted—weirdly enough I can’t recall our debut. I only remember how it felt like to be on stage for the first time, but I can’t exactly remember the details.” He ticks off his fingers. “Sometimes I come here and think I can hear Heechul-hyung’s voice hovering over Teukie-hyung’s part in Don’t don. Other times it’s you making a mess of my solo part in Sorry Sorry, and then, I wonder if ten years from now, I would recall this moment and think about how easy everything was, about how stupid it was to ponder over theoretical matters such as… how long we’re going to last, when I could just live in the moment, you know? It’s just…scary to realize that we can’t last forever—that our job has an expiration date and we can easily be replaced.”

Kyuhyun stares at him for a few seconds before directing his attention back to his phone. “Decidedly, yes, I think it’s time you buy that small studio in Osaka,”

Hyukjae lightly punches his shoulder. “Asshole.”

Kyuhyun laughs. “I get you. Really,” He drops his phone back onto the floor and stares at their reflection in the mirror. “Sometimes I walk out of my room and I expect to see Shindong-hyung shouting over the whirring of the juice blender,”

Hyukjae grins, his nostrils flaring. “The infamous juice blender that was smashed to smithereens by Lee Donghaek,”

“You know, Donghae-hyung should be the one overthinking the future of our band. He’ll be the first to go broke,”

Hyukjae laughs. “He’ll be fine. He’ll probably start an acting career or something.”

“The perks of having good looks.” Kyuhyun says. “You know what. Hyung, you were right, I think it’s time you start planning your retirement. I’m worried you’ll end up being jobless—not that you aren’t right now,”

That earned him another punch from Hyukjae. “You’re awfully cocky, aren’t you?”

“Jokes aside, what I’m trying to say is that all good things come to an end. We just need to learn how to deal with that.”

Kyuhyun had never been good at conversations like that. He prefers to take life as it comes. He doesn’t like to dwell on hypothetical ideas and all the things that make him feel sad.

Most of the days, Hyukjae is the same in a way too. It’s just that he believes that he’s still not mature enough to accept that there is an end to everything. He doesn’t want them to drift towards different paths that don’t intersect at the end. He wants to slow down the mechanical ticking of time, to turn the minutes into hours and the days into weeks, just so they could have an eternity of running endlessly around the stage with cold microphones in their hands and bright lights in their hairs; Just the premise of them being an established band that is ought to last forever.

“To be fair” Kyuhyun suddenly says making Hyukjae snap out of his thoughts. “I think you and Donghae-hyung will probably do your D&E thing forever—even when you'll turn old and smelly with your hips cracking halfway through the first verse of Danger,”

Hyukjae frowns. “I don’t know whether to feel offended or flattered,”

“That’s how overweening you and Lee Donghae are. I can’t believe you once had the audacity to ask the company for a concert tour when you only had two songs.”

“We are pretty ambitious, yes”

“Overly ambitious,” Kyuhyun corrects him. He lifts his hand and points at Hyukjae’s bangs. “Is that a grey hair I see there?”

“We are going to pretend that you didn’t get your grey hair dyed last night?”

Kyuhyun playfully knocks their shoulders together. “Hyung we’re so small compared to the universe,”

Hyukjae rolls his eyes. “Right. Here we go again,”

“Once you grasp that, you’ll start to see things differently,” 

Hyukjae hums.

“But for the record, I would come see you if you ever open that dance studio in Osaka.”

“I’m glad you finally reached the conclusion that you _do_ need to work on your dancing skills.”

“No, I mean it. I’ll buy you street Okonomiyaki and we’ll go stroll around the Shitennoji Temple and see the Geishas,”

Hyukjae laughs. “You’re just using me to check off your bucket list,”

“Yes, but I’m choosing _you_ for that. That counts for something.”

Hyukjae smiles warmly. “The Geishas all look fake nowadays.”

Kyuhyun frowns. “I don’t expect to see real walking Geishas in the 21th century anyway.”

Hyukjae purses his lips in thought. “There’s an onsen ryokan with a charming architecture that I went to with Donghae while we were touring, we could go there too.”

“I’ve never been to an onsen.” Kyuhyun says.

“It’s like a sauna but even better.”

“I’m not really fond of saunas.” Kyuhyun admits.

“Trust me, you’ll like the onsen. The skies are so clear at night you could almost see the milky way,”

“Deal.” Kyuhyun says. “How come Teukie-hyung didn’t make the discovery of onsens yet?”

Hyukjae snorts. “We’ll lose him forever if he ever does. How could someone be addicted to the sauna?”

“That’s an illness.” Their eyes meet for a second and they laugh. “We just like to bully him, don’t we?”

“Right? To be fair, I read somewhere that saunas are pretty beneficial for your health.” Hyukjae says.

“Yeah, until your skin rips off.”

Something buzzes. Kyuhyun stares at his phone for a few seconds before sliding it back into his pocket after reading the message. “Yongsun-hyung is waiting outside.” He holds his hands down to Hyukjae. “Can you walk or did your existential crisis cripple you?”

Hyukjae places his hands in his. “You’ll have to carry me bridal-style to the car.”

Kyuhyun pulls him upright to his feet. “You’ll just crawl.” He then stops and stares at him, and Hyukjae stares back with a blank face. Kyuhyun’s grip slowly tightens around his hands, his skin is cold, almost numb. “We have to fight for the dorms, hyung, so if someday—if you ever get bullied out of Osaka, you’ll have a home to come back to.”

Hyukjae laughs at how awkwardly Kyuhyun was staring at him by now. “What are you being so sappy for?” He covers Kyuhyun’s cold hands with his. “I want to have Jjajangmyeon for dinner tonight.”

“I’ll ask Yongsun-hyung to drop you by Andongjang on the way,” Kyuhyun says.

“I meant that I want _your_ Jjajangmyeon.” 

“I know, but we’re still having ddukbokki tonight.”

“Jerkface.” He interlaces their fingers. “You’d better listen to my whims if you really want us to fight together for the dorms.”

“Right.” Kyuhyun says with a touch of affection in his voice. “Don’t take me seriously, I just said that so you wouldn’t feel like you were being embarrassing on your own today.”

Hyukjae hums in response, thinks of how warm Kyuhyun’s hand is, of how lucky he is to be where he is at that moment.

There will be more ghosts and endings and dots where commas should be, but it’s okay. There will also be more begninings and first times and what’s more important in all of this is the now and the more years to come.


End file.
